One Flew Over Crows Nest
The Old Coronas they're the best
Once Upon a Time in the West!

Belly's bilious
Coughing up mucus
Head is leaden
The bloody flu again!

Need a leg up pull the chain
Watch the green flume of phlegm
Exit the u-bend descending into stenched sewers
Swirling like the sound within my chest
Time once again folks for….
Once Upon a Time in the West!

Yeah the best part in being ill is being slowly sedentary
Viewing one of your favourite films manly, on your own,
Lights, camera, action!
Reclining in ones chair for a Sergio Leone
One of his all-time best,
The flu can fly for two hours tonight,
Once Upon a Time in the West!

The opening scene like Russian Roulette and Jese' Louise
That rattling bronchi within my chest
As the dancers of death take up their triangular stance
On the random platform of different sized planks
But no-one exits the train,
Nobody around,
They turn to leave and then they hear the haunting harmonica sound,
Charles Bronson nevertheless,
Ladies and gentlemen,
Once Upon a Time in the West!

Three dusters go down
But that black honey cap gun nearly ends a great film just as it's begun,
Because our harmonica player Bronson goes down but only
for now,
He's about to rise and head down to the trading post where the other hombre,
Robert Robards, aka Cheyenne,
(The one I'd like to be)
Not at all good
But not all a bad man

Flu like and flopped in my chair
He's looking cool we've got similar hair,
Both looking sweaty though I am half dressed,
Everything's fine,
Once Upon a Time in the West!

Salt water scene four killers gun down
An innocent family meaner than mean
I should have watched a James Bond
Perhaps Live and Let Die
My rib cage is rattling,
Tense, tighter than tight
Frank spits out chewed tobacco
I spit out some muck,
A wry smile crosses my chops
Yeah he'll run out of luck.
If I was Cheyenne?
I sit and I ponder….

Then Frank kills the child
Jesus Christ that's Henry Fonda!
Well you would never have guessed, Once Upon a Time in the West!

'Your friends have a high mortality rate'
What a line
One of the greats
And just then, just wait
Mmmm, Jill, Claudia Cardinale,
I don't need a train right now
I'm sailing, I'm Gone with the Wind Where high temperatures take me Scarlett O'Hara to scarlet fever,
Mrs McBain, I'd love to please her!

Cheyenne approaches Harmonica, "The guy on the right's out of this game"
Says Cheyenne,
'You just don't know how to play'
He's out of the frame
At my behest
Links shot right through,
Once Upon a Time in the West

I'm getting sleepy now
When you hear a strange sound
Hit the ground!
Just like that one?
Nah, that's me patting my dear wife's bum,
"Did you make coffee?" I say,
She replies, "this time I did, and
Stop pretending your Billy the Kid" 'But baby I've got the flu',
You're brave handsome cowboy blue,
Not that railroad weasel Mr Chu Chu,
So sexy, put down that smartphone
And silly lateral flow test,
One day we'll come back for answers,
Once Upon a Time in the West!