I have a dear friend called Russel Bradley who for many years has had a successfull family business in and around Caersws. His son and daughter Nick and Joanne now mostly run the business. Over a beer, (as usual) I asked Russ' could he explain to me the shop sign meaning in their new Cost- Cutter shop window. After I had mischievously asked him a few times, I jokingly wasn't content with his answers, he said, "I don't know, ask Nick or Jo". Ah, I thought! As there was a rhyme in his answer I said to Russel, " there could be a poem coming on. FACT....not wanting to upset anybody from Caersws but, most of the locals never pronounce the name of their wonderful village correctly and so.....
Shop The Way You Live
Shop The Way You Live
(What's That Mean)
They've got it right in Carsoos Caresoos
Whichever way you or they say
Wanna pronounce this place
It was once great
It still is great shag, pal, mate
But what about?
Wait....
The shop sign on the window of the Bradley's Costcutter,
Curiously keen!
Shop The Way You Live
What's that bloody mean?
I asked a passer-by
I said "hi,
Ja see that sign on that new shop?
It says,
Shop Till You....
Oh no it's not!
It says, Shop The Way You Live
What's the spin on it in downtown
Carsoos Caresoos?"
They looked at me as though my head should be in a noose,
They said "it's whatever you choose to interpret it you twit, twit, Twitter it"
I said "oh"
They replied nullified
"Well I don't believe bleedin' know,
Go and ask Russ, Nick or Jo",
Well Carsoos citizen,
There's no need to shout,
I mean,
Shop The Way You Live
What's that all about?
Shop The Way You Live huh!
What the f....?
Shop The Way You Live
Perhaps cut costs and give, give give,
Nah, that's surely not it?
I saw a very Welsh lady
In a very Welsh
mask,
I asked, "have you always lived in
Carsoos Caresoos?
Boy if I did she took me to task,
I stood astounded, aghast,
The conversation did not get off to a good start,
Never mind said sign
She declined to consider it,
Sent shivers down my spine, Because,
I was inclined to think
She had greeted me as Thelma
Oh no, sorry I beg your pardon,
Delma!
I chanced to pronounce
Carsoos, Caresoos,
The way the locals seem to say,
It was a very big mistake,
Her Celtic consciences were set on fire,
She announced out loud,
"It's Caer, Caer, Caersws!"
I looked bereft,
I turned and left,
Thinking I don't care,
I didn't swear,
I wouldn't dare,
All I care, all I care All I care....
There's a shop sign in Car-sws Care-sws,
Shop The Way You Live!
What, how?
I'm completely miffed,
Shop The Way You Live
Shop the Way You Live,
What, on the breadline, deadlines, Chasing time,
Being extremely organised?
Hey fiddle fiddle,
Dilly-dally diddle,
Surely a weekly shop in Morrisons?
Maybe Lidl?
Shop the Way You Live
Perhaps from
Day to day?
Weh hey,
The penny's dropped
Yeah, that must be it ,
Musn't it?
Shop The way You Live!
(Local extended version)
Yeah,
Forget about town and those vast superstores,
With their computerised checkouts and unidentified item in the baggage area,
Bullshit bores,
Buy one get one free for an extra three quid.
Didn't need it,
Took it back
They won't accept,
Apparently
Due to covid.
I'm out of here
I'm on my way,
An indoctrinated humdrum human, saying....
"Sorry sir,
Have a nice"....
Day in, day out,
Suckers, let's get back to the village shop, Costcutters,
Cor, look what they've got?
Got the bleeding lot,
And no machine serving squat,
Got cost-cutting deals,
Hot, hot, hot!
So get down to Costcutters in Car-sws, Care-sws,
I don't care which sws it is?
Take a spin,
Meet friendly staff like Lynnie....
Bound to cheer your shopping cost cutting outing,
There's no doubting it,
And now an even better change, Because who works there now?
Well are
Jamesy James!
So get on the scene,
Shop The Way You Live,
Know what I mean?